The Undocumented Immigrant’s Guide to Free Government Cell Phones

Well, why not? There’s nothing like free stuff to keep people voting Democrat! So of course your government wants to make signing up for free stuff as easy as possible. Hence, their handy-dandy new pamphlet:

130723-free-cellphones-for-illegals[1]Much to our surprise, there are no regulations that prohibit undocumented immigrants from getting these phones.

In fact, based on our research we assume many undocumented immigrants are already using the free government cell phone program to help land jobs, to keep in touch with doctors and other medical professionals, to stay in touch with their family, and to reach 911 in emergency situations.

And best of all, every time an illegal alien signs up for a Free Government Cell Phone, Mexican billionaire Carlos Slim gets even richer!