Caldwell voted to go Full Commie, here’s what to expect

Yesterday Comrade Lace and his sanctimonious sycophants succeeded in scrapping 9 years of successful local government by convincing a majority of our citizens to embrace higher taxes, less freedom, and a return to iron fisted Democratic Party rule. Republicans Dassing, Hauser, and Fiore are out; three more Democratic Socialists Kelley, Rodgers, and Schmidt are in.

So what can we expect come January 1st? Well, in the immortal words of the late Ed Koch, “The people have spoken and now they must be punished.”

Borough Administrator Paul Carelli is out, to be replaced by a Maureen Ruane clone. That is they’ll appoint someone who’s willing to overlook the niceties of Council resolutions when disbursing taxpayer funds to Party apparatchiks. CFO/Borough Clerk Lisa O’Neill is out too. In her place they’ll dig up a half-dead retired CPA who’ll pretend to provide “oversight” from his vacation home while “misplacing” $120,000, or more. And of course Borough Attorney Greg Mascera’s services will be terminated and a reliable Democrat installed in his place.

In fact no one’s job at Borough Hall or the Community Center is safe. Dick Codey needs to plant his pension-padding party loyalists in positions of power so anyone in his way is gonna get kicked to the curb. Think of it this way, Mayor Dassing’s philosophy of government run like a business will transform overnight into new Mayor Kelley’s vision of government run like the DMV, only worse.

And then the Real Fun can begin. Because Comrade Zampolit Lace needs us to Get Woke. So no more curbside leaf collection. And I’ll wager that he’ll make us compost our Christmas trees in our yards too. Because the econuts have oodles of time on their hands to shove yard waste into those silly paper bags and they figure the rest of us do too. And if you’ve got bum knees like me and can’t handle all that bending and fetching, tough. They’re on a Mission and we’re just collateral damage.

Speaking of bags, your new Politburo will ban them. Plastic, paper, it doesn’t matter. You will cart around those germ-infested cloth bags while you shop and you’ll like it. Everybody has to pitch in to Save The Planet. And if you forgot to bring one, or just stopped off at Jacks for a few things on your way home from the bus, you’ll have to purchase another “reusable” bag. Think of it as the first of the many new taxes they’ll impose while curtailing our freedom.

After they ban plastic grocery bags they’ll ban plastic straws, plastic cutlery, plastic takeout containers, and styrofoam too. Your convenience is no match for their activism. Remember, it’s time to Get Woke, peasant!

Next on the Progressive Socialist hit parade? Making Caldwell a Sanctuary City, and setting up “needle exchange” for our opioid addicts. Plus a mandatory $15 minimum wage for all businesses in town and quotas for minority hiring. All of which will, of course, ensure that Bloomfield Avenue soon resembles the wastelands of formerly prosperous towns like East Orange and Irvington as merchants move away to preserve what little profits Democrat Governor Phil Murphy allows them to keep.

Ah but then they can declare the Avenue “blighted” and impose a Redevelopment Plan featuring the urban socialists’ dream of “mixed use” architecture. Imagine high-density high-rises in the East German style lining Bloomfield Avenue, concrete monstrosities with street level retail spaces featuring the usual urban hipster blend of overpriced coffee shops, marijuana dispensaries, used clothing boutiques, and vegan juice bars. Above that they’ll put unibox apartments designed by brutalists according to UN approved “green building” specs. Does that mean every flat gets exactly one composting toilet? Of course it does. It means the whole ugly thing will be wrapped in solar panels too.

And what’s a $15 minimum wage if they can’t enact it for public employees as well? You might have heard them promise to keep our taxes in check but deep down in your hearts you know they were lying. (The first clue being their enthusiastic support for the Full Day Babysitting Boondoggle tax hike.) They’re gonna raise taxes on everything that’s not standing still. And then they’re gonna pass out the goodies to their favored constituencies — public employees, welfare queens, and illegal aliens. You think our taxes are high now? Just wait until their need to virtue-signal “compassion” intersects with your wallet.

Then they’ll administer the coup de grâce. A local income tax. It’s the only way to get around the 2% property tax cap. Governor Murphy set up the framework for Jersey City but left the door open for any town to impose one for “good cause.” And what’s a better cause than Progressive Socialism? BOHICA!

Do I have to go on? Because I’m getting depressed. This is what you geniuses voted for Caldwell. So don’t come crying to me when you get it, good and hard.

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Wherein Kelley, Rodgers, and Schmidt respond! With “Go away, peasant”

Well they did promise to “return” phone calls. They didn’t promise a substantive response. And as it turns out, they’re not interested in answering my questions.

Here’s their email to me:

Dear Mr. Wysocki,

Thank you for your inquiry. We prefer to work directly with the press to get our message across. You are welcome to access our information on our website: kelleyrodgersschmidt.com which is available to all. There are also links to recent press coverage of our campaign which will be continually updated.

We have made a pledge to run a civil campaign and intend to keep it that way. We feel strongly that political discourse, as with any conversation, should be one grounded on respect and facts. Upon looking at your blog, it is clear that it is not the kind of impartial platform that would be receptive to our messaging.

That being said, we are having a meet the candidates event at Rock ’n Joes this Sunday from 9:30 – 11:00 AM and we would be more than happy to have a conversation with you in person.

Yours sincerely,

Kelley, Rodgers, Schmidt

Got that? Go read our website you peon. You’re not our kind of guy so we don’t feel like talking to you. Unless you do it on our terms, then maybe we’ll deign to share our munificence, if you kiss the ring and kneel before Zod first.

So beware Caldwell. These guys aren’t even elected yet and they’re already way too sanctimonious. Can you imagine how they’ll be if they win?

Constituent: Hi, I have some questions.

Kelley, Rodgers, Schmidt: Take a number, stand in line when it’s convenient for us, and if we decide you’re worthy enough we’ll pretend to care about your issue. Maybe.

But then, that’s the M-O of their zampolit, Councilman Jonathan Lace, who only lowers himself to interact with the common folk during “virtual office hours,” usually every Wednesday between 8:30 and 9:30 PM, which is when he says he’s available to answer email. Except he too blows me off because he’s got thinner skin than an onion and he’s apparently never been exposed to sarcasm before. Also he doesn’t like tough questions.

I’m not sure sure where that lies on the “civility” and “respect” scale, but hey, there you go. Or as the great Kurt Schlichter put it:

Civility, once properly understood as a means to an end rather than an end in and of itself, has morphed from an aspiration into a political/cultural gimp suit designed to prevent you from effectively asserting your interests and your point of view.

For liberals, civility is a grift – they think it’s a punchline and they’re waiting to laugh at you for embracing it. It’s a way to keep you from interrupting their non-stop attacks on your rights, your faith, and your dignity by convincing you that it’s somehow wrong to get upset when, say, some Astroturf Tot backed up by a bunch of leftist Red Guard orgs like Planned Parenthood and Move On starts shrieking that you have blood on your hands.

These guys lecture me about civility and then turn around and embrace Cory Booker who flat out stated that Republicans are evil incarnate, not long after he furiously browbeat Kirstjen Neilson on national television and then bragged about it on Twitter in what obviously passes for “civility” over at Caldwell Democrat HQ.

Bottom line. When Caldwell’s Democrats say “civility,” they mean “obfuscate.” They don’t want to answer my questions because then they’ll expose just how radically left-wing they really are. So I’ll answer for them. Questions 1, 2, and 4 are about taxes. Here’s the scoop, they’re gonna raise our taxes faster than you can say “I told you so.” Comrade Lace dreams of imposing a local income tax in Caldwell, and with a Democrat council majority he’ll get it. As for question 3 (making Caldwell a “sanctuary city”), of course that’s the plan. Illegal aliens before taxpayers, it’s what every Democrat everywhere wants. And on question 5 (legalized marijuana sales), they’re chomping at the bit for that one too. It’s why they were so happy to trumpet their endorsement by Stephen Modica, the former Democratic party council candidate who got busted for possession.

I guess they figure if we’re all stoned we won’t notice how they’re running our town into the ground.