Today’s English Lesson

This is the most interesting English lesson I have had to date.

Did you know “listen” and “silent” use the same letters?

Do you know that the words “race car” spelled backwards still spells “race car”?

And that “eat” is the only word that if you take the first letter and move it to the last, it spells its past tense “ate”?

And have you noticed that if you rearrange the letters in “illegal immigrants,” and add just a few more letters, it spells:

“Go home you free-loading, benefit-grabbing, resource-sucking, fraudulently voting, non-English-speaking jackasses and take those other hairy-faced, sandal-wearing, bomb-making, camel-riding, goat-loving, raggedy-ass terrorist bastards with you.”

How weird is that?

ISIS Has ‘Grievances’? Why didn’t they say so! Tell ’em to celebrate Festivus with us!

Joint Chiefs Chairman General Martin Dempsey recently told an interviewer, “ISIS has ‘grievances’ that need to be addressed.”

Grievances? Why didn’t they say so?

Because, we’ve got a holiday for that!

C’mon Muslims, adopt Festivus, make it yours, air your grievances!

Then we’ll get a couple of Marines to face off with some of your guys in the Feats of Strength.

Kick your ass, we will. Pin you, too.

Gee, this multicultural thing might work out after all.

In a surprise move, the Cleveland Browns fired their fans today

Seems legit to me:

In other news, the Browns shook up their front office.

In a stunning move Tuesday, the Cleveland Browns fired CEO Joe Banner and former general manager Michael Lombardi, while elevating assistant GM Ray Farmer.

Lombardi, a former NFL Network analyst, lasted just 13 months as the Browns’ general manager, hiring head coach Rob Chudzinski, who was fired after one season, and replacing him with former Jets defensive coordinator Mike Pettine after a long search.

That’s the Browns, where guys who couldn’t cut it with the Jets go to die.