Run Away! DHS says rock-throwing illegal aliens are scarier than a killer rabbit

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Run Away. It’s official US Border Patrol policy. When faced with a killer rabbit rock-throwing illegal alien, our government says “run away.”

Top administration officials have directed 21,000 border patrol officers to retreat whenever illegal immigrants throw rocks at them, and to avoid getting in front of foreign drug-smugglers’ vehicles as they head north with their drug shipments.

“Agents shall not discharge firearms in response to thrown or hurled projectiles… agents should obtain a tactical advantage in these situations, such as seeking cover or distancing themselves,” said the instructions, issued Mar. 7, under the signature of Michael Fisher, chief of U.S. Border Patrol.

Agents were also directed to keep their weapons holstered when drug smugglers drive by.

Agents can’t use guns against “a moving vehicle merely fleeing from agents,” say the instructions.

The instructions also suggest that officers be penalized if they don’t step back.

Brave Sir Robin joined the border patrol!

Agents would be equipped with short-range tasers and pepper spray, plus medium-range pellet guns, to deter attacks.

Me? I’d use the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

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2 thoughts on “Run Away! DHS says rock-throwing illegal aliens are scarier than a killer rabbit

  1. Pingback: The #VRWC report, the Cory Booker’s road trip to Hawaii edition | He's pretty fly for a Jersey guy

  2. Pingback: You’re Not Crunchy Enough | Through a Glass Darkly

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